Page 1 of 3
Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:06 am
by enterprikayak
Cause there's got to be a Fat Chef Riker thread...***********************************************
I just made
scones which is my very favouritest recipe and takes hardly 15 mins (including bake time).
White scones with jam and or marg and or butter and or cream cheese! 
Brown scones with butter and eaten alongside hot soup or corn on the cob or ...... In any case: with cold milk and or tea.EnterpriseScribe's EnterpriseScones
Pre-heat oven to 450F!!!
1 tbsp white vinegar
3/4 c milk (the higher the % the better)^^ mix these 2 together first and let sit to curdle
while you mix the other stuff. vv
2 cups flour (brn for dinner scone w/ butter; wht for dessert scone w/ jam)
1/4 c sugar
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
2 tsp baking powderMix these dry ingred's together in a medium bowl with a whisk (leaving out the milk and vinegar for now).
Take
5 tbsp hard square marg or butter (not softspread) and with *clean* hands
knead the butter into the dry ingredients for two minutes until it is evenly distributed and crumbly.
Now! Get your wooden spoon! (or spatula/scraper whatever)
Pour the curdled milk mixture into the dry stuff and beat round and round with your spoon for a whole minute, or until you get a playdoh like ball of dough.
Separate doughball into 8 equal balls and press slightly to make ovoid spheroid whateveroids.
or
Pat whole doughball into circle appx 7-8" wide and 1" thick. Use knife to cut into 8 equal triangular wedges. Separate wedges at least 1" apart.
Best if baked on stoneware-type flat cookie sheet, but any cookie sheet will do.
Bake at 450F for 11-14 minutes (watch carefully!)
They're done when just turning golden brown.
yumyumyumyumyumyumyumyum
You can 1/2 the recipe by using 90 mL milk, 1 skimpy tbsp vinegar (yep, still use 1), 1 cup flour, 2 tbsp sugar, 1 tsp b.powd., 1/2 tsp soda, 1/2 tsp salt, 3 tbs marg. Makes 4 this way.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:22 am
by evcake
Sigh...low carb here. But I have my memories...
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:27 am
by enterprikayak
come on! baking soda is lo-carb, and it's really all really mostly just baking soda.....and y'know.....some other stuff.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:29 am
by evcake
Well, maybe just one...got any honey?
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:30 am
by CX
I'm an American dammit, give me raw red meat, right in a bowl! Forget about that, just give me the live cow, and I'll carve what I want, and ride the rest home!
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:31 am
by enterprikayak
well then CX you must selsct option number one up there.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:35 am
by CX
Actually you don't really have an option up there for me. I pretty much just eat beef and other related items. Don't much care for other types of meat or vegetables or fruit, or most other things that would actually be healthy for me.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:36 am
by evcake
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:40 am
by enterprikayak
really? you just eat beef? and "related products"
how do you...y'know.....not...die?
anyhow, anyone who can
carve what I want, and ride the rest home!
can probably safely pick number one and be certain that the
spirit of their eating habits will shine through any small inaccuracies the poll may be restricted by.
(is "french fry" a "related product"?
)
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:41 am
by CX
Yup, goes with burgers.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:42 am
by enterprikayak
well, so ketchup and relish are vegetables then. you'll be fine. right Distracted? he'll be fine, right?
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:42 am
by CX
Bleh, hate relish. And pickles for that matter.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:46 am
by enterprikayak
That's two thirds of your vegetable pool!
No wonder yer shippin' all that phlegm around. You don't need horse pills. What you need is a good carrot in the mouth.
see, like in figure G here:
...only, um, minus the tacks and things.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:47 am
by CX
Bleh, carrots.
Re: Fat Chef Riker's Trexipes
Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:48 am
by evcake
Mmmmmm... sweet relish, dill relish, zucchini relish, corn relish, last-of-garden relish. All good.
And big carrots, roasted like potatoes...