Beauty/body image, society and everything that's wrong with

[JadziaKathryn]

As I've said before, being physically attracted to someone may indeed reel you in, but that alone will not make a relationship last. It's compatability and friendship that matter in the end. I believe that anyway.

YES!

[enterprikayak]

Blackn'Blue, you are of course, quite right.

no bullshit attitude

That's the wee bit that has to do with your handle, yes?

[Bether6074]

The whole concept of trying to be what someone else wants you to be comes from lack of self-confidence. Learn to be proud of who you are and tell the world to kiss your hairy ass. That's all you have to do.

And any healthy person is attractive, no matter how they are made. A healthy person is neither floppy fat nor rail thin. A person who is truly healthy is going to have the proper amount of body fat for their physiology. A healthy person is neither too muscle bound to comb their own hair, nor too frail to pick up a fork. They move easily and smoothly, with grace and dignity. A healthy person smiles readily, has a sparkle in their eye, and a spring in their step.

A healthy person is also healthy in mind. They like themselves, they are always willing to like and accept other people for who they are, because they can accept THEMSELVES for who they are. That is part of what makes them healthy. And people like that are very attractive.

The rest of it is personal taste. Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder. For my taste, I prefer short, freckled, curly brunettes with voluptuous curves, sparkling brown eyes that snap with fire, strong but not bulky arms and legs, a button nose, full lips, and a no bullshit attitude. So that is who I married. To each their own.

BnB, you said it better than I ever could....especially that "kiss your hairy ass" part. I agree 100%!

[Elessar]

It should be understood that when I'm comparing and contrasting looks and body styles and butt shapes like a pair of running shoes at Footlocker it's assumed that I'm just speaking within the parameters of physical attributes. To say I'd find ___ kind of woman (as described physically) most attractive is not to indicate that that's a sufficient condition for, say, marrying her. I've encountered a number of women that I can stand back and appraise and realize are not as physicall attractive as I might like, but has a personality or a habit that just drives me nuts. Independent, unpredictable, and even a flash of militancy really gets me goin more than anything

[justTripn]

I was going to say that in my experience the difference between men showing an interest in me (at my age that consists of them discretely asking if I am married or volunteering that they are not) and me being invisible in that way is about 12 pounds. (More attention on the thinner side.) So if you are at that age where your are in the market for a significant other, by all means, lose those five or ten pounds. Go for it! And men, go ahead and lift those weights. It will improve your attractiveness and exponentially improve your odds of success.

In the long run, however, function matters more than size and shape. Being pregnant (ridiculously hugely pregnant with twins, kind of changed my outlook to emphasize the importance of function over appearance). And my husband doesn't care about the 12 pounds one way or the other, so whether I do or don't maintain an ideal weight is a little less urgent.

So on the one hand, biology/physchology of our brains is what it is, no sense in complaining about it. You WILL be more attractive and successful with the body shape that the opposite sex is looking for. On the other hand, we have to deal with the cards we are dealt and accept our non-ideal selves, which are usually GOOD ENOUGH FOR ALL PRACTICAL PURPOSES he, he . . .

[JadziaKathryn]

we have to deal with the cards we are dealt and accept our non-ideal selves, which are usually GOOD ENOUGH FOR ALL PRACTICAL PURPOSES he, he . . .

This is true. Even without an ounce of body fat I couldn't be a size 0. On the other hand, it'll be easier to have children some day because I'm not a twig. And a lot healthier for me and my future children.

[blacknblue]

A valid point. Beauty standards have varied a lot over history. Look at Rueben's (sp?) paintings. Actually, I have always preferred curves on a woman, and I know I am not the only one.

I am going to face ostracism and a howling mob of pitchfork toting vigilantes on this board for saying this, but for example Jolene Blalock is just too skinny for my taste. I admire her beauty, but she is not the kind of woman that I would be attracted to for my own desires.

*flees for his life*

[evcake]

You go that <-way, and I'll tell 'em you went that-> way.

[CoffeeCat]

A valid point. Beauty standards have varied a lot over history. Look at Rueben's (sp?) paintings. Actually, I have always preferred curves on a woman, and I know I am not the only one.

Back when I was a season 1 Enterprise fan I used to chat often with the webmistress of all the Enterprise actors. AND I learned that Connor Trinneer prefers a curvey woman with a bit of meat on her.


I just thought you ladies might find that interesting.

[Kevin Thomas Riley]

I am going to face ostracism and a howling mob of pitchfork toting vigilantes on this board for saying this, but for example Jolene Blalock is just too skinny for my taste. I admire her beauty, but she is not the kind of woman that I would be attracted to for my own desires.

*flees for his life*

*scrambles pitchforks*

Get 'im, folks!

Well, like Elessar, I tend to prefer the slimer look on a woman. In my eyes Jolene is as perfect as anyone can be. And I'm certainly no Connor Trinneer myself.

[CX]

Ditto. I like that toned, fit look, but I'm hardly in shape myself. Well, maybe pear shaped...

[Mitchell]

Me I aint so picky. As long as a women dosnt look like they'll kill over from a Heart attack after goin up a few flights of stairs, Or look like their about to drop dead of starvation. Any where safely between those two points an, I be happy.

Looks aint everything. Their's far more important things that should be taken into consideration first. Sure it be nice if all women could look like world class athletes, Or Healthy Models/actresses like Miss. Blalock. While were at it, It be great if all of us Men Could be as Fit as a NAVY SEAL. But that sure the hell aint possible.

I sure the hell aint even close to that kinda shape, But I sure the heck aint about to drop dead either from a hard bit of work. So I aint gona expect the ultimate in Female physical fitness from a women. When I know I myself cant reach the Ultimate in male Physical fitness. It just aint fair.

[Kevin Thomas Riley]

Ditto. I like that toned, fit look, but I'm hardly in shape myself. Well, maybe pear shaped...

Couldn't have said it better myself!

[Linda]

I agree with those who put healthy before any particular body type. I could stand to loose a few pounds myself (10 - 20 lbs), not just for looks but to be a little more healthy. But I have to face it, I have laughed at the Riker jokes we have had on this site and Trip/T'Poler's. I just thought that Frakes has 'let himself go' over the years, and I never asked myself if that might be a medical condition - I just laughed at the jokes. So I am not completely immune to the thin body image attitude society imposes on us. Especially since I like the look of Jolene's body, but I have enough of a good self image not to fret over the fact that no way could I ever have achieved her looks myself, not even when I was young. Still, it is difficult to not wish I was a little more like her...

[CoffeeCat]

^ As one who participated in the Riker jokes - I just want to say that I don't think that Riker really got that big over the years. For a man his age, he actually looks very healthy. (and I think that 1st season Riker w/o the beard is pretty damn hot, actually)

I don't have any real defense for the parody - only that it was more about poking fun at the fact that he changed too much for the *the_abomination* narrative to be consistent with The Pegasus.