"Word Picture" Drabbles

[Distracted]

Okay. Time to stir the pot. Here's the challenge:

Create a drabble of exactly 100 words which describes a person, scene or place related to Enterprise. The following rules apply:

1. You may not use any names.
2. You may not use any spoken dialogue (inner thoughts are okay, but not as if the person is speaking). This is a descriptive exercise.
3. Because of rule 2, you obviously cannot copy word for word from episode transcripts. You must visualize the scene in your head and paint a verbal picture. Try to do it in a narrative if you can and not just "He has blue eyes, dirty blonde hair and looks dishy in blue coveralls". I want to be able to see a picture in my head of the subject you're describing.

The first person who guesses the person, scene or place goes next. I've got a meeting to go to now but if no one's posted a drabble by the time I get back then I'll go first. Otherwise, if anybody gets a wild idea just go for it. The second person to post a drabble must guess the first drabble correctly before posting theirs.

[Silverbullet]

Distracted, this lets me out. Good luck with your drabble. There are some good writers here who should be able to meet your conditions.

(Mr dialogue) SB

[Cogito]

My 'Guess Who' drabble attempts seemed to be depressingly difficult for people to get. I'm struggling to think of one that would be 'guessable' (yes, that is too a word, just ask Hoshi ...) without any dialog.

[WarpGirl]

Oooooh!!!! New challenge! I gotta try this! Thank you Dis!

Cogito not all of your drabbles are un-guessable.

[Cogito]

I figure if I can get in quick enough, I can sneak my turn in without having to guess somebody else's drabble.

I'm not sure that this was what Distracted intended, but here's my first attempt.

Two names and an episode earns you the right to go next.

Suddenly, there was bright light around me and the durasteel panel under my feet was replaced by
familiar deck plating. I froze for a moment, and looked desperately around me. Surely we couldn't …

With growing horror, I realised that yes, we could.

It's OK, they can't know how we got here. And then it hit me. I was off duty. He was off duty. And
that left …

I looked up, and my worst fears were realised. It's amazing how expressive a delicately arched
eyebrow can be.

Oh god, she was never going to let me live this down.

[WarpGirl]

I thought we couldn't do 1st person narration???

[Cogito]

I thought we couldn't do 1st person narration???

Why not? I thought it was dialog that was not allowed.

[Distracted]

Distracted, this lets me out. Good luck with your drabble. There are some good writers here who should be able to meet your conditions.

(Mr dialogue) SB

That's a shame, SB. I was sort of hoping that this challenge would inspire you to stretch your wings.

Cogito, my intent was that it be third person description, since first person does, by definition, sound like the person is speaking and I said that was against the rules. I'll cut you some slack this time, though. It's a good drabble. It's Trip and Malcolm appearing on the bridge after their little adventure together... on Risa, wasn't it?

[WarpGirl]

[Cogito]

Cogito, my intent was that it be third person description, since first person does, by definition, sound like the person is speaking and I said that was against the rules. I'll cut you some slack this time, though. It's a good drabble. It's Trip and Malcolm appearing on the bridge after their little adventure together... on Risa, wasn't it?

That's not what I understood by your challenge. Does it make any difference whether I write in the first person or the third person? I could go through and change 'i' to 'he' but I don't see that changes anything (except giving you a clue about the character's gender). There's no dialog, just some details of the scene and the character's inner thoughts. Isn't that what you intended? It's not about Risa, by the way.

[Distracted]

Cogito, I'm trying to get people to describe things without having a character tell them about it. I don't want the character to describe things. I want the writer to describe things. It's okay to do it from the character's POV, though. Does that make sense? I have an example all written but I can't post it unless I guess your drabble.

So, not about Trip and Malcolm returning from Risa, huh? Hmmm. When else did someone beam aboard, transported by T'Pol I'm assuming, and arrive in an embarrassing situation? I guess my memory isn't what it used to be. Sure wish you guys would pick the more well-known scenes to describe. *grumble, grumble*

Researching.... Researching...

Okay. I just don't have time to go over four seasons of screencaps to figure this out. I'm going to bed since I have to be up at 5:30. I'll have to catch the next round.

Please, people. Keep in mind that the writing part is the challenge here. The guessing is just a way to choose the person who's going to take the next turn. If you make these things too hard to guess it just slows the game down. The solution should be fairly obvious. If it's not, it's just frustrating and unnecessarily time consuming. Busy people don't have time for a trivia hunt. Since we're evoking images, the transcripts don't help. If we can't remember the scene it's just too hard to find it.

[WarpGirl]

Wait, has Dis been lying is "she" actually my college English Professor?

[Cogito]

So, not about Trip and Malcolm returning from Risa, huh? Hmmm. When else did someone beam aboard, transported by T'Pol I'm assuming, and arrive in an embarrassing situation? I guess my memory isn't what it used to be. Sure wish you guys would pick the more well-known scenes to describe. *grumble, grumble*

This is the problem I have with my 'guess' drabbles - what seems obvious to me seems completely unfathomable to other people. I guess this says something about my ability to paint a picture in words ...

The drabble was about Trip and Malcolm being beamed aboard the Enterprise in embarrassing circumstances, but it is not about the Risa episode. When else did Trip and Malcolm find themselves unexpectedly back aboard Enterprise and confronted by that eyebrow?

[panyasan]

I thought your drabble was great, Cogito and my guess is Dead stop. Somehow I felt it had the voice of Malcolm. Well, he could also be worried about what T'Pol thinks of him.

[Cogito]

I thought your drabble was great, Cogito and my guess is Dead stop. Somehow I felt it had the voice of Malcolm. Well, he could also be worried about what T'Pol thinks of him.

I had Trip in mind as the narrator but of course Malcolm was there too - you have the right episode. Well done!