Lady Rainbow wrote:
You're in charge of the shipboard holiday party on ENT. Here's the list:
Archer, T'Pol, Hoshi, Malcolm, Trip, Travis, Phlox, Cutler, Rostov, Chef, Porthos, Soval, Shran, plus yourself (14 in all)
It's your job to assign people as "Secret Santa" to each other. How would you do it? And what would they get their "person". (Ex. Trip and T'Pol?}
Hmmm. Okay. The way we do Secret Santa at my office isn't in pairs. Everyone has their own. I'd do it this way:
I have Chef. I would volunteer to cook Cajun one weekend a month and give the poor man some time off.
T'Pol has Hoshi. She'd give her a copy of the Kirshara in the original ancient Vulcan. Hoshi would be thrilled.
Malcolm has Cutler. He'd panic because he has NO idea what to give her and ask Hoshi what to do. She'd tell him to get her a nice scented cologne or something for the shower. He still won't know which one to ask the quartermaster for, and she'll end up with an economy sized bottle of antibacterial body wash.
Trip has T'Pol. He'll give her a whole peach pie.
Travis has Rostov. He'd give him a book about creative atmospheric maneuvers one can do with a shuttlecraft...once proper modifications are made. He and Rostov will promptly head to the shuttlebay to start working on them.
Phlox has Soval. He'll give him a collection of Denobulan love poetry translated into Vulcan. Soval will find it fascinating.
Cutler has Phlox. She'll give him a pair of red satin boxers with white fur trim.
Rostov has Porthos. He'll fabricate him a lovely metal mesh collar with shiny studs from Engineering castoffs.
Chef has Trip. He'll promise to serve catfish once a month on the anniversary of Trip's birthday for a whole year.
Porthos has Archer, so Archer gives himself a one year subscription to "Water Polo Monthly", transmitted via subspace.
Soval has Shran. After debating whether he should simply give up on the whole idea of a cultural exchange in Human fashion and just go home, he decides to gift him with an assortment of human condiments including horseradish, Tabasco sauce, and wasabi, with instructions to add them liberally in any combination to any dish of Shran's choosing to get the full effect. His motivation, of course, is to expand Shran's culinary horizons and has absolutely nothing to do with revenge.
Shran has Malcolm. He gives him a traditional Andorian hunting blade. Malcolm is overjoyed.
Archer has me. (I'm in charge of the gift giving. Of course I'd make the captain owe me something.) He'd probably give me a gift certificate to the quartermaster so I could get my own gift since he doesn't know me from Eve.
Q: Would you be willing to join Starfleet security and wear the infamous red shirt?
If I'm wearing a red shirt, I'm in engineering.
