My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Just what it says on the tin.

Moderators: justTripn, Elessar, dark_rain

User avatar
Elessar
Site Owner
Posts: 3467
Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:45 pm
Location: Missouri
Contact:

My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Elessar » Sun Nov 22, 2009 8:38 am

Linked here is the first post I made regarding some reviews about the Blu-Ray materials of Twilight.

Yes, I got out there for the New Moon midnight premiere and yes, it was a 12-17 year-old-girl madhouse. It would take forever and also probably be impossible to recall all the details in a chronological order so I'm going to hit the key points that stick out in my mind, in addition to a lot of commentary and comparison to the novel. I would recommend this review to anyone who has read the book and is trying to decide whether to see the movie, OR, has seen the movie but is trying to decide whether to read the book(s). If you want to stop right here I'll just say that if I were ranking the movie out of 10 with regard to book-to-movie porting, I'd give it a 9. If I were ranking it in terms of how good a movie it was period, I'd say 9.5.

Please Consider All Following Information Spoilerific for New Moon the book AND the movie!

Starting out, I cannot begin to describe how jazzed I was when first reading New Moon to discover that Stephanie Meyer decided to quote the lines from Romeo & Juliet that go something like:

These violent delights have violent ends
And in their triumph die, like fire and powder.
Which, as they kiss, consume.


It was always one of my favorites, and is from the scene in R&J when the friar is marrying them. As you can kind of discern, it basically warns against consuming passion, lust, and the kind of love that Shakespeare loved to write about so much -- devotion. A great deal of A Midsummer Night's Dream is spent on the topic of devotion, in that case, it was the kind imbued by magic spells. Later, in R&J, he dabbled in the idea of a naturally occurring devotion that was, in the end, self-destructive. I think the fascinating parallels between R&J and Twilight are that, if you read the series, S. Meyer clearly thinks her tale superior to R&J, though I have no doubt that unless she's career suicidal, she'd never admit it. If you read between the lines of a few veiled references and comments, particularly, one from Edward in which he criticizes Romeo for being so fickle; plus another by Bella asking herself what would have happened if Paris hadn't been such a bad guy and if Juliet had actually liked him as a friend, if he'd been a great guy (like Jacob). In the New Moon chapter "Paris", Jacob is clearly styled after Paris from R&J, only he's portrayed as much harder to dislike, and thus harder to dismiss. Meyer-through-Bella practically comes out and says that it would be a much more compelling romantic quandary if Paris were a nice enough guy and if the wedding hadn't forced Juliet's hand. The last thing I will say about the parallel to Romeo & Juliet is that, many a movie critic and viewer have complained that throughout the first two films, it's hard to see any of the 3 loving each other because they are so "joyless". S. Meyer's portrayal of devotional love is definitely one bordering on macabre... there is almost no time when Bella seems actually *happy* to be with Edward, she just seems like she can't stand to be any other way. I think this pace follows very much with the fantasy romance vehicle and is probably why a lot of people more entertained by realistic love stories would cheer for Team Jacob and/or fail to see the appeal in the entire franchise. That said, I don't think being Team Jacob makes a lot of sense since he has very obviously been the romantic foil from the beginning.... he's the boy she "should love", which in most fantasy romances (not to mention teen romances), automatically makes him the boy she won't love. That said, I have a few reasons for finding this beautifully asymmetric arrangement pleasing.

To get back to the movie, I knew how a lot of it would unfold from reading the book, and as a fan I was continually grabbed by the fun interactions between the characters in the beginning. New Moon is basically broken up into 5 main parts:

1. Before the Birthday
2. The Birthday
3. Post Birthday
4. Jacob
5. Alice & Italy



1. Before the birthday - showing us what "a day in the life of a love-struck, star-crossed highschool dream couple" is like. Just average daily things going on, as well as setting the stage for Bella's increasing anxiety about getting older.

2. The Birthday - significant rising action to the film in which the first conflict is introduced.

3. Post Birthday - Bella's in despair, depressed, and basically acting like a zombie. I liked and respected how realistic and disturbing they portrayed her night terrors. The one thing that bothered me was that way later, the novel presented a picture of just how bad it really was when Alice shows up and Bella wakes up to overhear her dad telling Alice about it... this is not in the movie. We hear about how right after Edward left, Bella basically went catatonic. Was like a stone for a week when he started to pack up her things and her mother came, at which point she went ballistic, screaming about not being able to leave Forks. That's when she "woke up" to the real world, but didn't really get any better. "Sleep-walked through senior year" is the phrase they use in every schpiel. I read somewhere the director, Chris Weitz, say that he's never worked with an actress as "serious" as Kristen Stewart, and that she was dedicated to really showing Bella's depression. I think this panned out, because it's very well done, IMO. Similarly to how Twilight's romantic pace seemed too fast to some, viewers may think Bella's depression is over-the-top, but I think this is because the nature of film compresses how much time can really be spent showing someone depressed. The rotating camera shot that says "October, November, December" is an excellent transference of the way it was done in the book. Basically after she falls asleep in a psychotic fervor, after Sam finds her, the book just has 3 blank pages with the block letters on them "October, November, December" to demonstrate that basically nothing of any consequence happened to her because she was just dead to the world. This period ends when she gets the bikes and takes them to Jacob's.

4. Jacob - this is when Bella begins to improve, but it's slow going. This section probably has the most deviations between the book and the movie. Primarily, it's inciting circumstances and motives that are changed. We are lead to believe that Bella gets the idea to ride a motorcycle for the thrill of seeing Edward's face by going up to some random guy in front of a bar and getting a ride on his bike. This is only partially true - she gets the 'danger thrill' idea from approaching strange men, because it reminds her of almost being mugged in Port Angeles (which was actually much more terrifying in the book Twilight than in the movie Twilight. In the book it looked like she might actually get like raped and killed, and the scene was longer), but she doesn't ride his bike. The bike idea comes to her randomly as she is driving down the street and sees some bikes out on someone's front lawn to be picked up for trash. She learns that these belong to... I think Seth and Leah... And it is possible that the movie wanted to put off having to introduce the Seth/Leah family until Eclipse, since so much else was going on with the werewolf side of things as it is. Everything from when she takes the bikes to Jacob until Alice returns is pretty spot-on. The only thing left out is exactly how Bella finds "The Meadow" again (The Meadow is an EXTREMELY important symbol throughout S. Meyer's series), where she first saw Edward's skin. She finds it in the book when she and Jacob finish working on the bikes and go riding several times but have to find something new to do. She says she found this great place in the woods and wants to find it again, so they go on several land nav sessions where he walks her through the woods but they never find it. Later, when he's sequestered on the reservation because he's transforming and she can't get ahold of him to save her life, she goes on her own and, wouldn't you know it, finds the Meadow just on a whim. That's when Laurent shows up. In the movie,the circumstances surrounding WHY she went out by herself are somewhat mysterious. In the book at least it was part of a process by which she was looking for the meadow with Jacob but couldn't find it. Naturally, she didn't tell him why it was important... and naturally he didn't care, he just wanted to spend more time with her.

5. Alice & Italy - when Alice shows up, the plot twists significantly. I could as easily call this section "Bella jumps off a cliff". After seeing Sam, Quil and Embry cliff diving, she realizes this would be a GREAT way to have an adrenaline rush. This scene is very well done, the jump itself, because it shows how I envisioned her. She dives, she sees him, she has a rush, she hits the water and comes back up, she's fine, she thinks "wow that was great I'm going to do it again!" and then is hit by the surf. Then again, and again. I heard girls in the theater actually gasping and crying. Like "oh my god, Bella might really die! AN HOUR INTO THE 2ND MOVIE!!!" Well, it was a pretty brutal near-drowning. Jacob swoops in and saves her, of course, his golden brown russet skin gleaming with icy water droplets, which, naturally, practically steam off his 108 degree body. I found myself wondering if it was intentional that S. Meyer aged Edward (108) the same as Jacob's body temperature (108) or if it was coincidence.

Of course, when Alice shows up, everything changes. We find out she can't see werewolves in her visions. Why? Because they are so impulsive and their "phasing" is so unpredictable that their futures are completely unknown. This reinforces that even the author is of the opinion that Jacob is a very unstable force in the book, at least after he changes. The parts relating to the changes Jacob goes through when he changes, as a person, not physically, are left a little wanting. There is significant time and attention paid in the book to the fact that he basically is a different person after he changes. His physicality should present a practical token of this transformation... he's NOT the same kid anymore and, very much like Edward or any other vampire does in their first few months/years of existence, spends the next 2 books trying to reclaim part of his humanity and to make his own path. This storyline is an interesting one, but is not really entertained or explored in this movie. I'm hoping there are a few more scenes dealing with this in the extended cut DVD.

I wouldn't call it a sixth part, but basically after Alice shows up, the ongoing Volturi storyline that will dominate the 3rd and 4th books is kicked off. This is a very important part of the movie, and probably could have stood to gain 15 to 20 minutes more screen time on details about the Volturi. We really only got any meaningful dialog from Aro, and it wasn't quite as I pictured it in the book. The Volturi hall was much more regal and fancy, less dungeon-like than I pictured in the book. The events from the point that Bella and Alice leave Forks to the point they get to the Volterra St. Marcus parade encompass only about 5 minutes in the movie, max, but probably 100 pages in the book. It's very sped up, which is understandable, because the primary action is "going to Italy". The details in the book about what she was thinking while they drove to the airport, or about how they changed planes in Houston, or in NYC, or about how agonizing it was to wait on the plane, or about how her and Alice talked more about changing her -- just weren't worthy of screen time. Jumping to the pair screaming down an Italian country road in a Porsche was a great segue, though, and I was actually relieved that some of the humdrum of getting INTO VOLTERRA that was seen in the book was weeded out. This whole scene was replicated nearly identically.

My one complaint about it is once she gets to him, in the book he doesn't believe she's really alive. The clock tower had just chimed and he had just taken a miniscule step into the sunlight when she collides with him and he looks up, thinking he'd been killed by the Volturi already. "Wow, they're quick", he says to himself. He looks down and sees Bella and thinks "Wow, Carlisle was right", thinking both he, and Bella, are dead, and the Carlisle was right about their little disagreement regarding whether they (vampires) have a soul, or are really doomed to eternal damnation. In the movie, once she said "Open your eyes" and he sees her, there is immediate understanding that she is alive. I preferred the book's version.

One of my overall favorite moments was between Bella and Jasper when he uses his mood-altering ability to get her to agree to Alice's proposal for a birthday party. Incidentally, the inquisitive viewer-but-not-reader may struggle with understanding why Jasper's ability works on Bella but not Edward's or (as we find out later, Aro's or Jane's). This is a little complicated but is explained in the book, and is related to the exact nature of Edward/Aro/Janes' abilities versus Jasper's, which is slightly different.

I have one main complaint that goes throughout the film and is just makeup-related. One of the aspects of Twilight that allowed me to become really engaged in it and to identify and care about these vampire characters, which in many other franchises are otherwise unreachable and, which the viewer is unsympathetic towards -- was the fact that they all looked more or less human, other than being extraordinarily attractive. This changed in the second film, and I'm not sure what the reasoning was. The eye color was much more pronounced to the point that in principal photography and early trailers, I thought they changed actors in some cases before looking it up. Laurent, Alice, Carlisle, Jasper, and Rosalie for the most part, look significantly different. It is, perhaps, just a result of the fact that they are now going to exaggerate the pretty eye color because it took off so well with fans... but it's distracting, and it's also a problem for believability. Could these people really walk around with these brilliantly yellow and orange and golden honey brown eyes and not attract the wrong kind of attention? Edward's eyes in the 2nd act of Twilight were just the perfect tone of brown to stand out and be a noticeable departure from the black (indicating no longer hungry, but sated)... but they took it slightly overboard in New Moon and I hope they back off it a little in Eclipse.

The film was much more true to the book than the first one. Notable deviations I can think of... the motorcycles... the scenes where the wolves chase Victoria (we were never shown that they actually came face to face with her, yet Jacob does (wolf form)... there is no physical confrontation between Edward and the Volturi in the book but he fights Dimitri in the movie... but everything else about this scene is accurately reproduced.

It felt a little like the movie ran out of time when she got home, everything was fine, and she never had to explain a single thing to Charlie. She actually had a VERY unpleasant, very serious lie-story she had to tell him to calm him down.

I also enjoyed that they accurately put together the "vote" chapter, from the very end of New Moon. That scene went down pretty much exactly as I pictured it with the exception that in the book I think they were all sitting at a table, but that doesn't matter any. I thought they might cut out/down Rosalie's response, which I didn't want them to do, because it has particular significance regarding the developing relationship and rapport between her and Bella later in Breaking Dawn... which will be important then.

All in all, I thought they did a great job with this one. I probably have a lot more to say but I'm exhausted and coherency has left me, so I'll add whatever thoughts occur to me as you all comment :)

What did YOU think of New Moon?
"I call shotgun!"
"I call nine millimeter." - John and Cameron



Favorites:
Vulcan For...
Your Mom n' Me

User avatar
enterprikayak
Token Canadian
Token Canadian
Posts: 3324
Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2007 10:40 pm
Show On Map: No
Location: Southwest Canada
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby enterprikayak » Sun Nov 22, 2009 7:25 pm

Wow, great review. Sometimes I can't understand why Elessar is slinging dishes and what have you when he should clearly be working as a writer for some magazine or something. Did you take a notebook with you into the theatre??? Very complete.

Made me almost want to watch the movie (sounds a lot better than the first one sounded), but as I am dead set against ever seeing any of them, alas I cannot. ;) The problem is, I'm a person who gets "soured" on something and then it gets all "tainted" and I can't like any of it. So I enjoyed the books, and I think if I watch the movie and get irritated with it, my several reservations about the whole story (ie, why do they SPARKLE!!!!!) would overflow into my conscious mind and I would get irritated (more so) with the whole franchise. So I just stick to the books.

I saw about 6 minutes of Twilight and I couldn't STAND the way KS played Bella. Nothing like I had pictured the Bella character at all. Same with Edward. I mean RP is obviously a very good looking guy, but I don't really know how he could be labelled "inhumanly handsome". I don't really know how you find inhumanly handsome beautiful people among human actors (you can't) so that part has a hard time translating into film form for me. I know 6 minutes is a pretty short interview, but it was getting all tainted (see above) and I had to stop.

The sparkling really pisses me off. I LIVE IN FORKS! I mean, I literally live less than a couple of hundred miles from the stupid imaginary white house in the clearing. And therefore I can say with absolute authority, that if you live here, you get sunshine almost every day. You get rain on the sun and sun on the rain. You do NOT go for long periods walking around in the daytime if you sparkle supernaturally in the sun, because you would be caught forthwith.

The First Beach scenes in new Moon were filmed at the beach where Priso and I got together btw, so when you watch it, you can picture little Priso 'n' me sitting on the beach (at Tofino, it's called). We were 16. lol

Our 13 year anniversary of Tofino is on Nov 29!

Anyhow, Stephenie Meyer is from Arizona and I think she came here once on a rainy week for a vacation and now it's all FOOOOOORKS where the SUUN DOESN'T SHIIIIINE!

Anyhow... good review. Lots of peeps are gonna check this out now who wouldn't have before I think, Johnny boy!
Image
|||||||||enterpriseScrybe & enterpriseScrybe2 TrekVids||||||||| www.trekref.info|||||||||www.TriaxTpolitan.com|||||||||
"Let's be honest with ourselves: there's nothing easy about the life we've chosen. But we don't do it because it's easy, dammit!
We do it because the tits are big and the bat'leths are sharp and the ships are fast!"

User avatar
Elessar
Site Owner
Posts: 3467
Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:45 pm
Location: Missouri
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Elessar » Sun Nov 22, 2009 8:18 pm

Well good! :lol:

All of your Forks/Pacific Northwest-related criticism aside :lol:, no I didn't take a notebook with me, and I only saw it once!

I've polished and added a bit to the review since I first posted it.

I understand how you feel about RP and KS playing those characters, because I hear that a lot from book purists. I'm convinced that the problem is reading the book first. PLUS, I'm sorry, but the director of Twilight did not know what she was doing. Catherine Hardwicke had done "Thirteen", and that's about it. I look back on the Twilight franchise so far and sort of how it's developed and even though I love it, it's like Enterprise, there are 2 or 3 things I don't like about how it's been implemented that were somewhat shared in New Moon as a result of being grandfathered in by how Catherine Hardwicke did it. Here's a list:

1. Nikki Reed is just wrong for Rosalie. She, more than any other of them, IMO, is miscast, and the primary reason I'm thinking Hardwicke chose her is because she knew and worked with her closely on Thirteen. I don't have a problem with Nikki Reed, she just doesn't look the part... she's not that pretty and Rosalie's supposed to be drop dead gorgeous.

2. The emo music. I know, it's an emo franchise... but c'mon. They insert a few too many ambience-driven smorgasbord cut scenes. The only example I can draw up right now from memory is actually the one I LOVED, which is the one at the end of Twilight, when Bella is dying of the vampire venom and Edward sucks it out and she kind of has her life flash before her eyes. In many cases, though, there were scenes in Twilight and New Moon where a few different things were going on at once and they had the wrong music for the tone they were probably driving for.

3. Hardwicke had a serious cougar crush on Pattinson and at the time of Twilight, he really didn't have the acting breadth to do the job. I'm sorry, I'm not normally one for this kind of moving into the realm of the actors and their real lives, but if you listen to the Blu-Ray commentary, it is painfully obvious. I imagine this situation probably distracted the day-to-day working on the set and it just stands out to me. Now, that being said, I think RP has come a long way an was brilliant in New Moon. I mean, he also just IS Edward now, there's no denying that... but much of what EP has said about being dissatisfied with him, for me, has to do with the fact that #1 Hardwicke's stage direction SUCKED (they have all the wrong facial expressions and a number of absolutely incoherent moments that just deadpan instead of doing what they're meant to do -- this is all in Twilight). And so, for me, this has some residual feeling in New Moon, although like I said, I do think he's gotten much better.

I forgot to mention that the main reason I liked the brief scene between Jasper and Bella so much is because it is all-too-common for the "side characters" in movies to become marginalized. In truth, in the book, there is so much more room for characters and relationships to grow, that you don't NEED to marginalize anybody. There's a great deal of development of Jasper, probably in Eclipse and Breaking Dawn mostly, so I'm glad that they gave Jasper a little more personality. I mean you look at him in Twilight and he was written as like a wall ornament. He never says or does anything, which is understandable, because the focus was on Edward.

Did I also mention I'm in freakin love with Ashley Green/Alice? :lol: She's freakin adorable! :mrgreen: :drool: :loveeyes:

In the end of New Moon, Jasper votes with Bella, and this surprises her... because she wasn't sure if Jasper would be on her side or not. The little exchange between the two of them in the beginning is cute and very much the beginning of portraying her as their sister.
"I call shotgun!"
"I call nine millimeter." - John and Cameron



Favorites:
Vulcan For...
Your Mom n' Me

User avatar
enterprikayak
Token Canadian
Token Canadian
Posts: 3324
Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2007 10:40 pm
Show On Map: No
Location: Southwest Canada
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby enterprikayak » Sun Nov 22, 2009 10:03 pm

FOOOOOOOOOOOORKS.
Image
|||||||||enterpriseScrybe & enterpriseScrybe2 TrekVids||||||||| www.trekref.info|||||||||www.TriaxTpolitan.com|||||||||
"Let's be honest with ourselves: there's nothing easy about the life we've chosen. But we don't do it because it's easy, dammit!
We do it because the tits are big and the bat'leths are sharp and the ships are fast!"

User avatar
Elessar
Site Owner
Posts: 3467
Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:45 pm
Location: Missouri
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Elessar » Mon Nov 23, 2009 1:36 am

lolwut?
"I call shotgun!"
"I call nine millimeter." - John and Cameron



Favorites:
Vulcan For...
Your Mom n' Me

User avatar
enterprikayak
Token Canadian
Token Canadian
Posts: 3324
Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2007 10:40 pm
Show On Map: No
Location: Southwest Canada
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby enterprikayak » Mon Nov 23, 2009 2:30 am

Priso and I say that to each other sometimes. FOOOOOORRRRRKS. And then he usually makes some kind of horribly inappropriate joke about ice cold cucumbers. :lol: We tend to make fun of Twilight a lot. While still reading it. Ah, it's all part of the fun.


FOOOOOOOORRRRRRKS.
Image
|||||||||enterpriseScrybe & enterpriseScrybe2 TrekVids||||||||| www.trekref.info|||||||||www.TriaxTpolitan.com|||||||||
"Let's be honest with ourselves: there's nothing easy about the life we've chosen. But we don't do it because it's easy, dammit!
We do it because the tits are big and the bat'leths are sharp and the ships are fast!"

User avatar
Elessar
Site Owner
Posts: 3467
Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:45 pm
Location: Missouri
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Elessar » Mon Nov 23, 2009 3:59 am

enterprikayak wrote:Priso and I say that to each other sometimes. FOOOOOORRRRRKS. And then he usually makes some kind of horribly inappropriate joke about ice cold cucumbers. :lol: We tend to make fun of Twilight a lot. While still reading it. Ah, it's all part of the fun.


FOOOOOOOORRRRRRKS.


:lol: everything has something wrong with it. I complained a lot about how Hardwicke directed Twilight...

So have you both read all the books or?....
"I call shotgun!"
"I call nine millimeter." - John and Cameron



Favorites:
Vulcan For...
Your Mom n' Me

Distracted
Site Donor
Posts: 5036
Joined: Fri Dec 22, 2006 1:19 am
Show On Map: No
Location: Lafayette, LA

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Distracted » Mon Nov 23, 2009 4:00 am

"Ice cold cucumbers"??!!

The mind boggles. :wtf:
Image sig by chrisis1033

User avatar
enterprikayak
Token Canadian
Token Canadian
Posts: 3324
Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2007 10:40 pm
Show On Map: No
Location: Southwest Canada
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby enterprikayak » Mon Nov 23, 2009 4:21 am

Welcome to life at my house. :lol:
Image
|||||||||enterpriseScrybe & enterpriseScrybe2 TrekVids||||||||| www.trekref.info|||||||||www.TriaxTpolitan.com|||||||||
"Let's be honest with ourselves: there's nothing easy about the life we've chosen. But we don't do it because it's easy, dammit!
We do it because the tits are big and the bat'leths are sharp and the ships are fast!"

User avatar
Bether6074
Site Donor
Posts: 746
Joined: Fri Dec 22, 2006 12:38 am
Show On Map: No
Location: Upstate NY

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Bether6074 » Tue Nov 24, 2009 1:45 am

I really enjoyed New Moon and quickly became a Jacob fan. The actor has a truly rare combination of beefy and guy next door. He also comes across as gentle, but very protective. I had great fun with my 13 year old Friday afternoon watching the movie. I'm going to scroll back up and read your review now. :)
Image

User avatar
Elessar
Site Owner
Posts: 3467
Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:45 pm
Location: Missouri
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Elessar » Tue Nov 24, 2009 5:21 am

Bether6074 wrote:I really enjoyed New Moon and quickly became a Jacob fan. The actor has a truly rare combination of beefy and guy next door. He also comes across as gentle, but very protective. I had great fun with my 13 year old Friday afternoon watching the movie. I'm going to scroll back up and read your review now. :)


I don't mean to be so hard on Jacob. I really like him towards the end of Breaking Dawn. He might also be tolerable in Eclipse, I forget, I have only read it once.... but I remember 1 or 2 things he does that aren't nice. Gotta keep in mind that the situation as it ends in "New Moon" continues pretty much that way in Eclipse and of course, that doesn't go well for Jake.

In fact, one aspect I'm interested in seeing put to screen is the fact that Jacob goes lone wolf (da dun TISH) for several weeks or months after that little dust up at the end of New Moon and doesn't even phase back to human form for weeks. He becomes very "at one with the animal" because he's in less pain that way.

Don't get me wrong, I feel for Jacob, I really do... Every guy's been rejected at least once, usually more than once, and sometimes... sometimes it's by the kind of girl that doesn't leave anything behind when she goes. Jacob gives Bella everything and he loses it at all... for awhile... Man the more I talk about this the more pissed I get at Bella :lol:.

Still, he's also a jerk to her. He doesn't handle his pain very self-sacrificially, he kind of throws it at her... which is his prerogative, I suppose, but as she doesn't intend to hurt him, it hurts her back.
"I call shotgun!"
"I call nine millimeter." - John and Cameron



Favorites:
Vulcan For...
Your Mom n' Me

User avatar
enterprikayak
Token Canadian
Token Canadian
Posts: 3324
Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2007 10:40 pm
Show On Map: No
Location: Southwest Canada
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby enterprikayak » Tue Nov 24, 2009 5:33 am

Elessar wrote:
enterprikayak wrote:Priso and I say that to each other sometimes. FOOOOOORRRRRKS. And then he usually makes some kind of horribly inappropriate joke about ice cold cucumbers. :lol: We tend to make fun of Twilight a lot. While still reading it. Ah, it's all part of the fun.


FOOOOOOOORRRRRRKS.


:lol: everything has something wrong with it. I complained a lot about how Hardwicke directed Twilight...

So have you both read all the books or?....



Yeah, my little sis gave me the book for my bday last year. So I like *had* to read it. Then of course, there's this SECOND book, and then a THIRD and then a FOURTH....and then there's THE HOST....and so forth.

So then, I was screeching away about this relatively intriguing book with all these stupid sparkly vamps from RIIIIGHT NEEEEEXT DOOOOOORRRRR.....IN FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRKS and they SPARKLE and shite and I'm screeching away.

So I made Priso read them, in order that someone else could validate all my criticisms. :lol: While he was reading them, he'd stomp around the house, looking for his book, muttering, "Where's my crappy vampire book?" :guffaw:
Image
|||||||||enterpriseScrybe & enterpriseScrybe2 TrekVids||||||||| www.trekref.info|||||||||www.TriaxTpolitan.com|||||||||
"Let's be honest with ourselves: there's nothing easy about the life we've chosen. But we don't do it because it's easy, dammit!
We do it because the tits are big and the bat'leths are sharp and the ships are fast!"

User avatar
Elessar
Site Owner
Posts: 3467
Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:45 pm
Location: Missouri
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Elessar » Tue Nov 24, 2009 9:41 pm

enterprikayak wrote:
Elessar wrote:
enterprikayak wrote:Priso and I say that to each other sometimes. FOOOOOORRRRRKS. And then he usually makes some kind of horribly inappropriate joke about ice cold cucumbers. :lol: We tend to make fun of Twilight a lot. While still reading it. Ah, it's all part of the fun.


FOOOOOOOORRRRRRKS.


:lol: everything has something wrong with it. I complained a lot about how Hardwicke directed Twilight...

So have you both read all the books or?....



Yeah, my little sis gave me the book for my bday last year. So I like *had* to read it. Then of course, there's this SECOND book, and then a THIRD and then a FOURTH....and then there's THE HOST....and so forth.

So then, I was screeching away about this relatively intriguing book with all these stupid sparkly vamps from RIIIIGHT NEEEEEXT DOOOOOORRRRR.....IN FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRKS and they SPARKLE and shite and I'm screeching away.

So I made Priso read them, in order that someone else could validate all my criticisms. :lol: While he was reading them, he'd stomp around the house, looking for his book, muttering, "Where's my crappy vampire book?" :guffaw:


:guffaw: :guffaw: :guffaw: :guffaw: :guffaw: :guffaw: :guffaw:

In just a couple years, it'll be Aurelia sayin the same thing! :guffaw:
"I call shotgun!"
"I call nine millimeter." - John and Cameron



Favorites:
Vulcan For...
Your Mom n' Me

User avatar
Elessar
Site Owner
Posts: 3467
Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 10:45 pm
Location: Missouri
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby Elessar » Wed Nov 25, 2009 12:05 am

Interesting video, some interviews by CNN:

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/showbi ... inence.cnn

Greatest line:

"I've heard it called 'abstinence porn'." :lol:
"I call shotgun!"
"I call nine millimeter." - John and Cameron



Favorites:
Vulcan For...
Your Mom n' Me

User avatar
enterprikayak
Token Canadian
Token Canadian
Posts: 3324
Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2007 10:40 pm
Show On Map: No
Location: Southwest Canada
Contact:

Re: My Long and Probably Serpentine Review of New Moon

Postby enterprikayak » Wed Nov 25, 2009 12:20 am

Yeah, I don't know what S Meyer's husband is like, but abstinence is not the normal order for men. Edward's pretty amazingly chaste.

"No! I can't do it!!! I'm in FOOOOOORKS!" ...and so forth
Image
|||||||||enterpriseScrybe & enterpriseScrybe2 TrekVids||||||||| www.trekref.info|||||||||www.TriaxTpolitan.com|||||||||
"Let's be honest with ourselves: there's nothing easy about the life we've chosen. But we don't do it because it's easy, dammit!
We do it because the tits are big and the bat'leths are sharp and the ships are fast!"


Return to “General Chat”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 73 guests