TnT Christmas: Fic Bits

[JadziaKathryn]

I got this idea from what we were talking about on the Randomness thread. If anyone has a festive scene, do share!

Here's mine. It's set early in the first season:

Subcommander T’Pol had decided to research human traditions relating to the upcoming Christmas holiday. She had found it necessary to restrict her search once it became clear that the varied traditions could occupy her for an entire week.

There was no logic in Christmas. Theoretically the holiday was religious in origin, but that was certainly not evident from the crew’s behavior. Most perplexing was the entity known as ‘Santa Claus.’

Entering the mess hall, she quickly located Commander Tucker. Although prone to juvenile behavior and one of the most emotional humans she had encountered, he was a wealth of information about human customs. He would also defend them vigorously, and as she wished to understand the reasoning behind Christmas customs, that would be valuable.

The engineer was eating, as she knew he would be. It was his habit to eat a ‘snack,’ once his shift was completed.

“Subcommander!” he greeted her with his usual enthusiasm. For all Commander Tucker’s many faults, he was genuinely interested in people of all species. Exuberant emotion aside, it was a commendable trait.

“Commander Tucker. If you are available, I would like to discuss human customs with you.”

He stabbed a piece of cantaloupe from his fruit salad. “Shoot.”

“What?”

“Go ahead.”

Deciding to overlook his curious word choice for the time being, she pulled out her padd. “How does a corpulent and apparently immortal being in a red suit relate to celebrating the birth of a god?”

Tucker nearly spit out his cantaloupe as he laughed. “I’m sorry, Subcommander, but I’d never thought of it that way before.”

“It is an obvious question.”

“Well, I guess if you didn’t grow up with it… there are kind of two Christmases, see.”

“None of the information I read mentioned more than one Christmas.” This could prove quite enlightening. Perhaps she would submit a revised entry on Christmas to the Vulcan database.

“Not officially. There are some people who mostly focus on the religious part. Baby Jesus in the manger an’ all.”

“Indeed. Why would a deity not ensure a more sanitary place of birth?”

“‘Cause that’s exactly what people would expect. It just showed how different he was. Anyway, a lot of people just celebrate Christmas because it’s fun. Holiday cheer, parties, presents, trees, good food – it’s a blast!”

In T’Pol’s experience, explosions were hardly synonymous with what most species considered ‘fun.’ Nevertheless, she understood slightly more than she had before. “That is a satisfactory explanation. It is difficult to believe, however, that human children are inclined to accept that reindeer can fly for the first eight years of their lives. Vulcan children would realize the physical impossibility by the age of four, at most.”

Commander Tucker rolled his eyes in response. “Did they teach you about bumblebees, Subcommander?”

“How does a pollinating insect relate to reindeer?”

“Physics says that bumblebees can’t fly. They’ve got those big heavy bodies and just little wings. But nobody told the bumblebees. They just keep flyin.’”

T’Pol had not been aware of that, and the subject clearly warranted further research. “Fascinating. However, reindeer cannot fly.”

“It’s magic.”

“That is one of the least logical explanations I have ever heard.” Perhaps next he would attribute Santa Claus’s immortality to time travel.

“Well, most kids on Earth have never seen a reindeer. Heck, I still haven’t. But that’s besides the point. When we’re kids, anything is possible. It’s one of the best things about bein’ a kid. I guess Vulcan kids don’t have that, huh?”

“No.”

“That’s too bad.”

Ignoring his latest statement, she consulted her padd. “What about the elves? Once humans had traverse the entire planet it was clear that no such creatures exist.”

He shrugged. “I guess we were ahead of ourselves. If Vulcan were a little shorter…” he stopped when she glared at him. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to insult you.”

She reminded herself that this was a valuable learning experience, even if the commander did try her restraint. “Insult is the result of wounded pride. I have no such-”

“Emotion. Right.” He put a strawberry half in his mouth and hardly chewed it. “Well, Santa couldn’t make all those presents himself. He had ta have help.”

“Why could his help not be human?”

“Nobody ever met one of Santa’s helpers. I guess it made sense that they’d hafta be elves, then.”

It would be counterproductive to point out the flaws in his reasoning, as she still had many questions left regarding Christmas.

[Entilzha]

Short and sweet .

[Asso]

Delightful!

[Reanok]

Nice story jadzia Kthryn.

[Kevin Thomas Riley]

Very nice! I liked the part about Vulcans and elves!

[evcake]

My comment is a little late, sorry. Suffice to say, I enjoyed it very much.