Randomness

[Aquarius]

People just don't realize exactly how many accidents you can have while vacuuming!!

This has to be over 15 years ago now...I was an assistant manager for Accessory Lady, and my coworker LaWanda was vacuuming up after we'd closed while I counted down the drawer and did the paperwork. She had to change outlets because the cord was too short to do the whole store from any single one, so the next closest one to where she needed to be was behind this display of belts--as in the belt hangers were in the slot wall above the out let, and the belts were just hanging down over the outlet. That season we had belts with metal beaded trim along the edges, and when LaWanda pushed them aside to plug in the vacuum, one slipped and made contact with the prongs before it went all the way in. All I remember is this loud POP!, and the smell of something burning. LaWanda didn't get hurt, just surprised, and there was a big ol' scorch mark over the outlet and above it on the wall...and the belt in question didn't fare to well either. Once we'd established that she was okay and she had time to calm down and start breathing normally, we started laughing about it, and I took pictures of her "playing dead" beside the scorched wall, vacuum plug in hand.

Needless to say I moved the belts that night, regardless of the fact that Corporate told us they were supposed to go there...with a note explaining that the rationale behind going against Corporate should be self-evident considering LaWanda could've been a lot worse than startled.

[Entilzha]

http://www.smh.com.au/news/home/technology/world-of-warcraft-goes-down-the-toilet/2009/05/08/1241727593209.html
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/11/technology/11cybergames.html?_r=2&partner=rss&emc=rss the future of war.

[Linda]

Why am I not surprised about these cadet wargames? We ARE getting closer to Starfleet Academy games, LOL.

[Escriba]

Or to the movie "War Games"

[Aquarius]

Or to the movie "War Games"

Random piece of trivia: my friend Annie grew up in Los Angeles, and the school scenes for War Games were shot at her high school.

[Escriba]

Random piece of trivia: my friend Annie grew up in Los Angeles, and the school scenes for War Games were shot at her high school.

Hey, that's cool!

Anyway... EUROVISION SONG CONTEST IS HERE! Yeeeesss! I know, I know, it's absolutly dreadful. But that's the good thing about it! I mean, it's so HORRIBLE that it's good!

And this years songs are as horrible as I expected them to be! Yupeeee

Just look at Ukraine. With a title like "Be my Valentine" you could expect the worst!

Apparently this (because there is no other word to define it) is one of the favorites. It's from Greece. I think it's because the male singer is somewhat hot or something, because otherwise I can't understand it.

OH MOLDOVA!! (It's a must seen, it's so folkloric.) Errrr... and there is Serbia too... (didn't make to the finals, but oh boy...)

I wonder if the Albanian singer is old enough to drink Fortunately she has no idea of how to move on a scenery. The song is what I call "disco-folk." I don't have any idea what was Armenia's intention with this song, it's... weird.

Outrageous! Croatia has sent a bolero! You !

Let's draw a veil over Netherlands... I somehow liked Ireland (with the quality of the other songs, what do you expect? No so surprisingly, it didn't make to the finals) I'm not going to say anything about the musical qualities of the Norwegian song, but the lyrics are just silly. I don't like Malta's song (so, so cliche), but I'm glad they didn't send the accostumed bimbo. Errrr... Germany... Ehhh... I have no words. Unfortunately for the universal taste in music, Romania will receive the 12 points from Spain, believe me.

But stop all this madness... I have a favorite! YES! It's Estonia! Their song actually doesn't suck. It's kinda good (this is Eurovision, the standards are lower.) The song has a melody, the girl sings beautifully and she sings in Estonian. Yes! I'm so sick of everybody singing in English now (except France, of course). What happened to the tradition of Germany trying to send a good song in German, or Switzerland having to change the language every year by rotative turn! Geeez... And not even Spain has fought this stupidity! THIS is the horrible, horrible song we're sending.

Anyway, if you want to melt your neurones even more, HERE are the rest of the songs. The Final is in May 16th. Yay!

[Escriba]

Oh, dear, I love the girls in Go Fug Yourself! They've done an entry about the Eurovision contest's rehearsals! Every comments it's just hilarious!!

[panyasan]

Yes! Everbody should sing in their own lanquage at the Eurovision song contest. Why o why does everybody have to sing a stupid love song in akward English, when I want people to sing a studid love song in their own akward language. I want Greek songs, Spanish songs, German songs etc.
About that horrible non-song sung by three old, fat men, with three rather over-sized women as backing vocals, I almost died in embrassement. At least we don't see them back in the finals.
So it's now official : I am Norwegian. Or Azjerbedian (nice outfits). Or Estonian, the song sounded okay.

To proof there is good Dutch music:
a Dutch love song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xWE9ozb ... re=related
Most famous Dutch band ever:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXWdQGtl6qs
Just a very good band, playing in New York.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vn_pUxADmoY

[Aquarius]

I never imagined that it would be that bad...after all, this is the same event that put ABBA on the map in the 70s!

[panyasan]

I never imagined that it would be that bad...after all, this is the same event that put ABBA on the map in the 70s!

Yes, the event went downhill! They should change it dramaticly, like creating region-finals where the first 5 go to the final or something like that.

[Escriba]

Oh, panyasan, believe me: nobody is judging Dutch music by what we saw in Eurovision. It's Eurovision music, not real music.

But anyway, everybody knows that the best part of Eurovision (aside from imposible clothes and all that camp feeling) are the votes Ahhhh... It's just lovely how the old European alliances and resentments bring to the light

[panyasan]

But anyway, everybody knows that the best part of Eurovision (aside from imposible clothes and all that camp feeling) are the votes Ahhhh... It's just lovely how the old European alliances and resentments bring to the light

You know, it is made for little piece of writing by your hand, called "The votes."

[Escriba]

"The Votes"? You mean something like this?

THE HOST: (taking up a kalashnikov, just in case) Welcome to the *mumblemumble*th Eurovision Song Contest. After suffering... errr... excuse me... listening to all the songs, let's proceed to the votes! TheLordismysheeper...

ARMENIA: OK, 8 points to Azerbaijan, 10 to Georgia--
EVERYBODY: (looking at the host) Georgia doesn't take part this year!
ARMENIA: Doesn't it? Oh, crap! Well, then... ehhh... 10 points to... whatever! Russia! And 12 points to the Genocide Republic of Turkey.
TURKEY: Hey, I resent that!

THE HOST: Not so bad to begin with... Azerbaijan?
AZERBAIJAN: Hmmm? Oh, yeah... The same as Armenia, just take me out put them in and change the numbers a little.
EVERYBODY ELSE: You could conceal it at least!!

HOST: Okeeeyyy... Croatia?

Croatia is with the other Balkan countries, drinking alcohol and aiming at them with a gun.

CROATIA: Yeah?
HOST: Your votes.
CROATIA: Take every Balkan country and distribute the points among them. I think there are points for everybody.
FRANCE: This is outrageous! Pure nepotism!
CROATIA: You say that because you have no allies, frenchy.
FRANCE: (to himself) I'mnotgoingtocry, I'mnotgoingtocry...

HOST: Cyyyypruuuus, ohhhh Cyyypruuuus...
CYPRUS: Yeah, 8 points to Croatia, 10 points to Moldova, 12 to Greece and 12 to Turkey.
HOST: Emmmm... I think you're mistakened, Cyprus. You can't give Greece and Turkey each 12 points.
CYPRUS: Of course I can! Cyprus Assemble!

The signal is cut off.

HOST: Oh my dear Len-- *aheam* Denmark?

Denmark is playing waiter for the scandinavian countries.

DENMARK: Oh, 8, 10, 12. Finland, Sweden, Norway.
EVERYBODY ELSE: So unpredictable!

HOST: Who is next?
FYR MACEDONIA: I think it's me.
HOST: Who are you?
FYR MACEDONIA: The Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia.
HOST: Ok, and how are you called now?
FYR MACEDONIA: The Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia.
HOST: No, no, I get what it was, but what is---
FYR MACEDONIA: The Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia!
HOST: Look, I'm not an idiot, OK? Just tell me---
FYR MACEDONIA: Pancho! My name is Pancho!
HOST: *mumblemumble*Moaner*mumblemumble*... Germany?

Germany takes out a dice and throws it.

GERMANY: OK, five. Five points to Israel.
HOST: The points until 8 aren't said out loud, just showed down on the screen.
GERMANY: Which is totally unfair! Because I want to say and communicate to the world how great I think the Israeli song is. Brilliant! I loved the boy.
HOST: The singer was a woman.
GERMANY: Yeah, that! (Thinks a little.) This time she is really a woman, isn't she?
POLAND: Enough of this crap! You're voting for Israel because a not cured guilt feeling!
GERMANY: (very red) Of course not!
POLAND: Of course yes! Which is totally wrong, because those don't deserve any repentance.
ISRAEL: H-hey!
POLAND: We, on the other hand, have suffered a lot from the Gerrys. We deserve your apologies. So apologize, morons.
GERMANY: Come here and kiss my--
POLAND: (trying to stick a finger into Germany's eye) Apologize, apologize, apologize!
GERMANY: No way! Ahhhhhh!!

HOST: (in the verge of a nerve breakdown) G-Greece...?
GREECE: (while they avoid paper balls from Turkey) Ahhh... the smell of victory is so sweet. Isn't our singer just gorgeous? Anyway... Give our points to anybody except Turkey.
HOST: Israel!
ISRAEL: Welcome to Jerusalem, capital of Israel.
HOST: Was that really necessary?
ISRAEL: Just in case! Let's go with the voting...
GERMANY: (raising a hand) Oh, oh!
ISRAEL: Who are we going to vote...
GERMANY: Ah! Here, here!
ISRAEL: (totally ignoring them) Moldova, Rusia and Ukraine?
GERMANY: Why is never us?
ISRAEL: Because I would vote United Kingdom or even Austria before you. Hell, I would vote Poland before you.
POLAND: Hey!

Other countries vote in a very predictable way (see Montenegro) and we reach Romania.

ROMANIA: OK, 8 to Albania, 10 to Moldova and 12 to Ukraine.
SPAIN: What?! We are going to give you 12 points because every Romanian emigrant is going to vote and we don't deserve even a miserable point?!
ROMANIA: Put that in your pipe and smoke it!

Later...

HOST: It's Turkey's chance.
TURKEY: 'Key. First of all... can we enter the European Union?
EUROPEAN UNION: Hell, no!
TURKEY: What?! Why? We're cool and funny. Look, look, we've sent THIS to the contest.

Turkey plays the video again, again and again.

TURKEY: Well?
GERMANY: Sorry, my neurones don't work right now. Come later.
TURKEY: Ohhh, C'mon... don't be mean... Let me enter... (Turkey plays the video again) Well?
EUROPEAN UNION: Uh... maybe for--
THE VATICAN: No way!?
TURKEY: Excuse me?
EU: What are you doing here?
THE VATICAN: It is my divine right to veto any musli-- any dangerously radical and not totally Human Rights friendly country from entering the EU.
TURKEY: Yeah, since you're the paradigm of democracy and you've signed the Human Rights Treaty.
EU: What the--!? What are you doing here anyway? You're not even part of the EU.
HOST: (meekly) And you don't take part in the contest.
THE VATICAN: Eh? Oh, yeah...

The Vatican snaps the fingers and a nun with a guitar appears. She began to sing "Aleluya, aleluya." The rest of the people just stares, dumbfounded. Suddenly Netherlands raises a finger.

NETHERLANDS: (with a mask covering the face, to prevent anybody from recognizing them) Can we hire her for the next contest?

You meant something like this, panyasan?

[panyasan]

Suddenly Netherlands raises a finger.

NETHERLANDS: (with a mask covering the face, to prevent anybody from recognizing them) Can we hire her for the next contest?

You meant something like this, panyasan?

(panyasan laughed so hard, she dropped out of her chair and is now laughing under her desk)
Loved the host! (BTW, The real hosts of the show were really getting on my nerves. He was coming so close to the female host that if I was her he would have met the wrath of my elbow in his stomach.)

Loved Spain complaining about every imigrant voting for their own country. You know, people sometimes cross the border with their cell phones just to vote for their own country.

And of course, looooved that last bit!

[JadziaKathryn]

I love how the Germans voted for Israel. Very amusing!

Azerbaijan is in Eurovision? Isn't it in Asia? And Israel too?