And yeah, near-death experiences are fine with me in a rollicking adventure story. Otherwise, what do you have? An extended romance, with maybe a mild sci fi element here and there.

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Alelou wrote:Well, you've bought lots of leeway from me with this chapter (though I now fear I will be screaming NOOOOOOO! during the next).
And yeah, near-death experiences are fine with me in a rollicking adventure story. Otherwise, what do you have? An extended romance, with maybe a mild sci fi element here and there.like my stuff
Rigil Kent wrote:Nah, probably not. I'm hoping more for the "well that's an interesting take ..." Remember, I'm not a big fan of angst for angst's sake.
Rigil Kent wrote:Yeah, but you're not trying to write an adventure story, right? You're writing a romance with the occasional adventure element sneaking in. I'm doing kinda the opposite.
The reason I like this story so much is because it's a so build relationship that comes across very realistic. Take for example the lastest chapter: T'Pol takes a step toward being intimiate with Trip and it comes at the right time and after a conversation which reveals how much they care about each other. (I really liked Trips speech to T'Pol; I think it's the best speech any guy could give in his own way declaring his love.) The funny thing is, in the story the sexual tension and longing for T'Pol by Trip made me take his side completley and for his sake wanted that this moment had come sooner. Which I am glad it didn't, because it wouldn't work that well as it is now. Prove how well the story is written.Kotik wrote:That's why your story is so much better than some others that I've read, even though every week someone drops by and whacks T'Pol over the head or shoots Trip in the 'nads. It beats a will-they-won't-they massacre any daySome one hundred and eleventy pages ago in this thread one or more people complained that it took 40+ chapters for any more substantial sign of a TnT relationship, but IMHO it was one of the most realistic and believable build-ups i've ever seen (and that's saying something with me being a hardcore no-angst shipper).
I disagree, Kotik. Trip is acting like any soldier dropped in a war zone would act. He was haunted by that first kill. Also he has hardly has time to deal with the death and distruction around him, because every time he has to fight to survive. I do see that Trip has changed: he has become harder. It's something T'Pol noticed in the story and regrets. But it's no surprise given the hard situation Trip has been living for a year now.Kotik wrote:Con
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[*] Trip had to kill a lot of people, including that coup de grâce for that young girl (which wrenched my guts for sure). Maybe he 'dealt' with that a little too quickly.
Rigil Kent wrote:Factor in T'Pol's brain training, wherein his memory has become utterly eidetic, and you get a Trip who can close his eyes and remember every single technical schematic for the transporter that he's ever looked at.
Rigil Kent wrote: :Yeah, but you're not trying to write an adventure story, right?
Pitseleh wrote:The explanation does make a lot of sense, especially considering that this is the Trek universe. My brain has a hard time adapting to this sort of "super engineering" because of my training as an architect. While you are expected to have a notion about how everything works, from the outer design to the inner structure, the actual individual aspects are handled by the expert in each area, thus you have structural engineers and electric engineers and so on and so forth... So, while I am willing to accept that Trip is not only very intelligent (the guy must have at least a doctorate to handle his job) and his brain functions have improved given his Vulcan training and even the bond, I sometimes balk at the idea of him fixing and building everything, from the warp engine to the grav plating.
Kotik wrote:even though every week someone drops by and whacks T'Pol over the head or shoots Trip in the 'nads.
Your TnT act very mature. We don't have any silly-ass high-as-a-kite Trellium junk that bends T'Pol's mind out of shape
T'Pol sees and uses Trip's advantages. When she realizes that Trip has superior night-vision, she admits and accepts it without bending over backwards to avoid having to admit it.
Your Soval really is the S#itI love it how you developed him (the "Maywheather Fook" any one?
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Trip had to kill a lot of people, including that coup de grâce for that young girl (which wrenched my guts for sure). Maybe he 'dealt' with that a little too quickly.
Hoshi seems a tad underused.
I'm still intrigued by that mysterious family they were with for a while. Somehow that whole thing is still dangling somewhat unresolved. Since you're usually not the guy to left any plot-strings dangling unresolved, I've got the feeling that the Brady-bunch will make a comeback at one point.
Daniels. I punch the hate-button instinctively as soon as that numbnut shows up, because many stories with him end in a big honking reset-button resolve. Relying on you that this won't happen. If he were to reverse the events (ie preventing/reversing the crash) it would destroy a brilliant story. O loved how you used him to convice Soval to help pilfer the Enterprise
panyasan wrote:The reason I like this story so much is because it's a so build relationship that comes across very realistic.
I really liked Trips speech to T'Pol; I think it's the best speech any guy could give in his own way declaring his love.
I do see that Trip has changed: he has become harder. It's something T'Pol noticed in the story and regrets.
BTW, one of the things I liked about the last chapter is that Trip is finally beard free!
He found a shaver in the Vulcan ship. Very interesting - I hardly have seen a Vulcan with a beard of any facial "decoration" - shaving must be a daily routine after meditation for the Vulcan male.
Transwarp wrote:In your notes at the end of chapter 66, you write:
[i]"And if you're expecting an NC-17 chapter to fill in the blanks, sorry to disappoint. I don't write those. YOUR imagination will do a better job of describing the hot Vulcan lovin' than I could."
I for one much prefer the fade-to-black approach, and not because I'm offended by graphic sex, but for the very reason you mention. In my experience, most (not all, but most) of the graphic sex scenes I've read tend to become tedious and boring. That's why I rarely make it down to the decon chamber.
I think my initial point was that I just gloss over these inaccuracies and they don't distract from my enjoyment of the story (Although I clearly still NOTICE them--I can't help that; it's how I'm wired!)
aadarshinah wrote:Playing devil's advocate here (and knowing nothing at all about eidetic memories), wouldn't this do absolutley no good? I mean, yes, he has the memory now, but what good does that do him in remembering things he's already forgotten?
Rigil Kent wrote:I'm having a lot of fun playing with Soval. A lot of fun.Also? I really like Gary Graham.
Rigil Kent wrote:Spoiler: he hasn't dealt with it at all. He's just suppressed it and moved on. But overall, yeah, he has hardened quite a bit, but that's intentional. If you look at the pics I chose @ my site for each chapter installment, you should notice how I went from a smiling Trip to a stone-faced one. Again, my madness has a reason.
Rigil Kent wrote:I'm still intrigued by that mysterious family they were with for a while. Somehow that whole thing is still dangling somewhat unresolved. Since you're usually not the guy to left any plot-strings dangling unresolved, I've got the feeling that the Brady-bunch will make a comeback at one point.
No comment.
Rigil Kent wrote:Daniels is the reason the crash happened in the first place so he's not going to reverse that. I loath reset buttons with the passion of a billion suns so you can put your mind at ease there. To be honest, I don't know when or even if he's going to show back up so that might help too.
Rigil Kent wrote:And its something she will continue to regret. Ironically, I see both of these two as blaming themselves for how much their partner has changed - Trip feels a little guilty that T'Pol is becoming more openly emotional due to his influence, for example, while she fears that she's turned him into a weapon (which, frankly, she has, but it was essential for survival) - so there will be some angst, just not the "I love you, I hate you, come here, go away, its just an experiment, I want you back, OMG I'm stoned out of my mind" kind of angst. I'm going for a more realistic take (or as realistic as one can be in Trek, eh?)
Rigil Kent wrote:Well, we had MU Spock with the goatee, Sybok from that movie that was sort of de-canonized, and Soval had a goatee in the MU also so they can obviously grow a beard ...
Rigil Kent wrote:Normally, yeah, but this is Trek science and low-level telepathy on T'Pol's end does come into play. Believe it or not, I have thought about that, but ultimately decided to hand-wave it away by simply blaming it on Vulcan training. Plus, I always kind of envisioned Trip as having a nearly eidetic (or photographic as you may know it) memory anyway, so T'Pol's just enhancing what's already there.
Kotik wrote:I really hated, how Soval was being protrayed in the first 3 seasons. Where's the logic in appointing an ambassador, who practically thinks that all humans are window-licking idiots who couldn't catch a cold without proper Vulcan supervision.
While I've never been shot at during my military service
My major gripe with Daniels is, that for a temporal agent and all the über-responsibility it implicates, he was remarkably inept and just a TPITA (Temporal Pain In The Arse).
One thing that your story has as a main theme is, how flawlessly they've come to work together and my biggest hope is, that it stays that way - meaning that there'll be no T'Pol shutting him out, because she thinks (and unilaterally decides) she has to handle a certain problem by herself, while not giving a flying expletive what this shut-out does to him.
Except for Sybok, there is no indication of a Vulcan with a furry face in the RU, only in the MU.
This ÜberMemory!Trip is one of the (thankfully very few) elements of your story that I have problems buying. I know it's a bit of a plot tool, but it came a bit left-field and his improvement was way too quick. They've been on that planet for roughly a year, but such a high level of improvement would have taken months after months of intense training.
Rigil Kent wrote:Except for Sybok, there is no indication of a Vulcan with a furry face in the RU, only in the MU.
Not true. This guy instructed Tuvok in the 2270s, and has a beard so I felt it was believable enough to have a shaver aboard this ship.
aadarshinah wrote:And, as always, just becuase they don't wear facial hair, usually, doesn't mean they don't grow it. It's like their hair - they can grow it out, but for some reason they prefer their ubiquitous short cuts... its probably cultural.
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