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[CX]

Should make for an interesting read then. Is Master Chief going to show up and stick him with plasma gernade?

[blacknblue]

Nothing so merciful. I am going to let him be taken alive and given to the women.

[Asso]

My God!

[CoffeeCat]

First TOS fic since high school - first scene written today. Why did I write it? same reason as always- not a bloody clue.

The Ambassador's Wife



Personal Log; Amanda Grayson.

If only they knew.

If only they knew what I go through every time I follow my husband through the galaxy as his little helpmate.

Keep silent, they tell me; he's the ambassador to Vulcan, not you. You are to always walk two steps behind him unless you happen to visit Betazed, there you shall only appear an equal partner and not a matriarch like them. If he holds out his two fingers you are to accept the gesture immediately even if you're across a crowded conference in conversation. In that situation, you are to excuse yourself politely and attend to your husband as soon as you can...

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband very much. But there are times when I just don't like him much at all because, and I don't say this lightly, he can be a real pompous windbag.

Which brings me to the reason for this recording. It was last month that Spock underwent his kahs-wan and he almost died if it wasn't for the help of some distant cousin I've never even heard of. Sarek insisted that he embrace his Vulcan heritage - I've told him repeatedly that Spock was also human and, what of that part of his heritage? But Sarek wanted nothing of it. "The boy is always taunted in school because he's too human," was his answer.

If Spock had died, I would have left him. I mean it. I could almost hear Sarek's tart reply to such a notion: "That would be illogical, since it would put Vulcan/Human relations back a hundred years."

So, today is the day we meet with T'Nir and Spurk to negotiate for the hand of T'Pring.

I'm not looking forward to it.

That poor girl. She's being forced into marriage because Vulcan high society doesn't want to bring Pon Farr to the attention of the medical community.

The girl T'Pring is a brilliant child and I wouldn't mind having her for a daughter in law... but she's only seven years old and I'd rather see her and my son make their own decisions instead of having society dictate how they're to live: I don't want them to have my life.


"Amanda..."

"Computer, end log, file under Amanda security code one four seven zeta six five."

The computer chirped in submission and Amanda turned away from the console, hoping Sarek entered the house in time to hear at least the last paragraph of her log entry.

She wasn't in the mood to keep secrets and knew her husband would agree that hiding her opinions would be most illogical. Sarek might have been overly formal and smug, but he was a man who appreciated blunt honesty. If he asked to read her diary, Amanda would surrender it and be rewarded in the bed chamber later regardless of what she said - this was one of the reasons she stayed around.

Her robed husband appeared in the door frame, eying Amanda with the most curious expression. "You're expressing discontent with Vulcan culture again, my wife?" he held out his fingers in the most affectionate gesture all of Vulcan could come up with; she rolled her eyes before she got up and accepted.

"Do you find me overbearing this time?"

"'Pompous windbag' is the word I used, husband."

"Two words, Amanda. You're still expressing outrage at the decision to bond Spock to T'Pring."

She nodded, keeping her gaze steady and unwavering at Sarek.

"We've discussed this. It is very likely Spock will experience Pon Farr when he enters adulthood. He has passed his kahs-wan; it is his rite."

After so many years being married to Sarek, one thing was certain, she couldn't afford the opportunity for an emotional outburst. She'd already yelled at him, pleaded, and detailed all her reasons for her opposition - and his eyes just bore right into her, challenging her to not take that flawed emotional approach this time...

She was sick to death of logic and Sarek knew it. She bit her lower lip and thought for a moment; Sarek patiently giving her the time to come up with a logical reason for her contempt of the situation, but she couldn't quite put her jumbled thoughts and feelings into words just yet.

Chaos, she heard through the bond. Sarek dropped his fingers from hers and left their room.

In the back of Amanda's mind there was nothing but chaos; he was right.

[Distracted]

Hmmm. Very deep, Coffeecat. Could it be that you're tired of being at someone's beck and call? I can appreciate that. You go, girl. I'd like to read the rest of this.

[CoffeeCat]

The story came from me being rather annoyed with the Sarek/Amanda 'ship because there seemed very little chemistry there to begin with and Amanda really does seem to be at her husband's beck and call on screen and in fan fiction (she's like the ultimate 50's mom).

Also, a few months ago Samantha Quinn and I speculated that Sarek was a graduate of the "Archer School of asshattery Diplomacy".

So I thought long and hard about Amanda and come to the conclusion that she was the most two dimensional female character in the history of Trek and I really feel up to the challenge of making her more three dimensional.

[blacknblue]

Feel up to some psychological reverse engineering ladies?

We learn to relate to people of the opposite gender by our interactions with our parent of the opposite gender. according to the shrinks, our childhood interactions with our parent of the opposite gender will set the tone for our relationships with the other gender for the rest of our lives.

SO...

Spock's character is pretty well established, isn't it? He never was anywhere near the ladies man that Kirk was, but he did have some romance moments, didn't he? So given his established character, what can you interpolate about Amanda and his relationship with her?

[CoffeeCat]

That she's not *really* June Cleaver?

Zarabeth was really the only legit female we have to go on I think... I don't count Layla Kalomi because she kinda seemed like the "Christine Chapel stalker" type which Spock clearly wasn't attracted to unless under the influence of weird alien spores or what have you.

Also, he seemed to take an interest in the "Cloud Minders" chick whose only purpose was to be put on display as a work of art.\

To coin a phrase, "Fascinating."

[Distracted]

So if Zarabeth was a girl just like mom, then mom must have been a real independent go-getter and not a doormat. Interesting. I wonder what her motivations might have been to hook up with such a cold fish. Diplomatic aspirations maybe? Or maybe she was one of those women that lives for her field of study and Vulcans were her field of study.

[justTripn]

CoffeeCat, I love it. It would have made a great Strange New Worlds entry. I like the way, you show her conflict. She DOES love him, but she doesn't like him. Yes, fascinating!

[HopefulRomantic]

So if Zarabeth was a girl just like mom, then mom must have been a real independent go-getter and not a doormat. Interesting. I wonder what her motivations might have been to hook up with such a cold fish. Diplomatic aspirations maybe? Or maybe she was one of those women that lives for her field of study and Vulcans were her field of study.

Maybe Sarek wasn't a cold fish, and Amanda was perceptive enough to see the truer person underneath the surface persona. And that is the man who compelled her.

I've always thought Amanda had to have been singularly intriguing to have attracted Sarek's attention, and compelled him to conclude that she was the logical choice to marry. And Amanda struck me as enormously self-assured, not a doormat. Someone who was able to retain her human identity even after choosing to adopt Vulcan ways.

IMHO, each of them was likely different from the norm, to have been drawn to the other, despite their differences, and the challenges inherent in establishing a relationship. And it appeared in Journey To Babel that they allowed each other to be themselves, and gave each other what they needed. Amanda was plenty emotional, Sarek was affectionate with her (in private), Amanda was a properly sedate Vulcan (in public). And I love that Sarek teased her. That is a marvelous example of the person Amanda fell in love with, who was at the same time the very example of Vulchritude.

About Spock...my guess would be that Amanda had a close relationship with him, gave him unconditional love, taught him about compassion, understanding, tolerance, generosity. The human, emotional version of Vulcan values. Spock had great respect for his father, and chose the Vulcan way, so of course he didn't have girls falling into his arms every week. But he was capable of deep love. Sure, he had to be zapped by the spores in This Side of Paradise to be free to love Leila, but from the scenes with her that came before, it was as if his heart had been unleashed. The scene in the transporter room where he gave her up was just heartbreaking to me, because he was sacrificing that human life he could have chosen at age 7 after his kahs-wan, but didn't choose, and he was giving it up all over again, for a greater good.

Spock was also capable of deep, loving friendships (Kirk and McCoy), and I think Amanda had something to do with that. But I got the impression that he yearned for the kind of special, lasting love that his parents had.

[JadziaKathryn]

This scene is good, CoffeeCat, but what I really want is more of your other two stories!

[Asso]

This scene is good, CoffeeCat, but what I really want is more of your other two stories!

I agree!

[CoffeeCat]

There is actually more of "the Purge" in my livejournal - I tend to post it scene by scene until I get an entire chapter, and then I fit ff.net and all the other fanfic archives with it. I have 2 more scenes than what is already posted at paris-torres.net. "The Secret of the Amethyst" hasn't been updated since I last updated the thread here (so I haven't been holding back on anyone, just been plain lazy).

And as far as Amanda Grayson is concerned, I'm thinking she might be a cross between Zarabeth and the Cloud Minders chick, who, I recall, was actually very curious about different species and all the wonders of the galaxy, but also seemed kinda sad. I also think the fact that her only purpose was forced on her (to be "looked at") & it kinda reminds me of Amanda.

[JadziaKathryn]

Oh, I'm glad to see more of "The Purge." Innnnteresting.