Distracted wrote:So if Zarabeth was a girl just like mom, then mom must have been a real independent go-getter and not a doormat. Interesting. I wonder what her motivations might have been to hook up with such a cold fish. Diplomatic aspirations maybe? Or maybe she was one of those women that lives for her field of study and Vulcans were her field of study.
Maybe Sarek wasn't a cold fish, and Amanda was perceptive enough to see the truer person underneath the surface persona. And that is the man who compelled her.
I've always thought Amanda had to have been singularly intriguing to have attracted Sarek's attention, and compelled him to conclude that she was the logical choice to marry. And Amanda struck me as enormously self-assured, not a doormat. Someone who was able to retain her human identity even after choosing to adopt Vulcan ways.
IMHO, each of them was likely different from the norm, to have been drawn to the other, despite their differences, and the challenges inherent in establishing a relationship. And it appeared in
Journey To Babel that they allowed each other to be themselves, and gave each other what they needed. Amanda was plenty emotional, Sarek was affectionate with her (in private), Amanda was a properly sedate Vulcan (in public). And I love that Sarek teased her. That is a marvelous example of the person Amanda fell in love with, who was at the same time the very example of Vulchritude.
About Spock...my guess would be that Amanda had a close relationship with him, gave him unconditional love, taught him about compassion, understanding, tolerance, generosity. The human, emotional version of Vulcan values. Spock had great respect for his father, and chose the Vulcan way, so of course he didn't have girls falling into his arms every week. But he was capable of deep love. Sure, he had to be zapped by the spores in
This Side of Paradise to be free to love Leila, but from the scenes with her that came before, it was as if his heart had been unleashed. The scene in the transporter room where he gave her up was just heartbreaking to me, because he was sacrificing that human life he could have chosen at age 7 after his
kahs-wan, but didn't choose, and he was giving it up all over again, for a greater good.
Spock was also capable of deep, loving friendships (Kirk and McCoy), and I think Amanda had something to do with that. But I got the impression that he yearned for the kind of special, lasting love that his parents had.